So as you’ll be able to tell from reading a few of my other blog posts is that I do actually worry about EVERYTHING. I always have to have a plan in my head before I do things and if things don’t stick to my little imaginary plan then I just worry for no apparent reason – which if you’ll see from my very first blog post, its on my resolutions to stop worrying about things that are irrelevant.
But something i’m worrying about right now is if things don’t turn out the way I plan them or If I end up regreting making a decision that I have made. But really I just need to start looking at positive sides to things rather than always thinking something will go wrong as a solution to my worries because right now this minute, these things aren’t worth worrying about because things are turning out well and I don’t regret anything yet so why worry ‘just in case’ it a total waste of energy.
I realise todays blog post is very short in comparison to my others but I’ve just got in from a very cold walk and my hands are now FREEZING meaning its taken me about an hour to type it since my fingers are numb. But you could always just read my previous posts, give them a like and maybe even follow my blog if you’re feeling generous hahahaha
picture stolen from pinterest – as per usual
Something that I miss is school – and I never actually ever thought that i’d say that. Whilst I was there all I did was wish the days on because I just couldn’t wait to leave and not go back but now I’d actually give anything to go back again for another year. I’ll admit year 7 was awful, it was the year you had to try and make an impression on everyone to get friends and aim for a good reputation and I made some slightly different friends which didn’t turn out great and I haven’t actually spoken to them since but in year 8 I made the best friends who I am still so close with now. Year 8 was definitely my best year. However, in year 9 I got split up from those friends and made new ones but year 9 was definitely the year I grew up a bit and had more of a laugh rather than trying to make friends – my empty year 9 geography book just says it all hahahaha. The last two years were more of an up and down, I didn’t enjoy year 10 so much because it was the first year I would sit some of my GCSE’s and the stress finally hit me and I worried about it a lot more than I needed to meaning the outcome of my results didn’t make me the happiest. But in year 11, I resat the exams I didn’t excel in and did a lot better than I expected and I was so so happy. Year 11 was definitely the best/stressful/saddest school year, I loved the responsibility we got and the ability to have a laugh and a joke with teachers and friends, but we had quite a few exams which I think I handled much better. Then we left, and I cried. The summer holidays that year were great because I just thought ‘NO MORE SCHOOL’, little did I know that college would be pretty much the same, but worse.
I really do wish that I could go back to school for year 8 onwards and not have a day off and enjoy every single day because I do miss it so much. When I drive past or see the school kids walking home I wish I was them hahaha. I also miss the friends that I made who I ended up losing touch with from going to different colleges or chosing different subjects meaning I hardly see them. The teachers as well, some teachers I hated and i’m glad I left them behind, but others I miss so much because over the last 5 years seeing the same teachers over and over you become familiar with them and when suddenly they aren’t there to turn to its rather difficult.
So basically I miss my school days, which is even surprising to me. – I miss the time table, the lessons, the teachers, all the people in it, the familiarity, and my close friends. EVERYTHING.
If you’re reading this and are still in school hating every minute of it. DON’T! ENJOY IT or you’ll regret it afterwards – trust me on that one.
I don’t really have proper fears apart from the obvious ones of like dying and things. That obviously scares me. However I am sometimes scared of making a decision that is wrong for me and it turning out to be a mistake. I hate the feeling of regret and so I fear the decisions that I make before I even make up my mind which is why I resort to writing a list of pros and cons so I can see which decision is write for me much clearer. Linking to my last post, I also get scared of going places incase something happens, like a fear of the unknown. But this hardly ever happens so I need to stop letting it hold me back and risk it – even if i make the wrong decision at least I can say that I take risks and i’ve done it – whether that be me going shopping with friends or jumping out of a plane, i’ve still faced the fear. So take risks and face your fears because most of the time you’ll feel 100% better for doing so.
Although this links to the little motivational speech I just made I do have one fear that is incredibly stupid, and that is my fear of Michael Jackson. My brothers used to joke and say he was in my wardrobe and ever since then its been a fear that all my friends tease me about and do horrible things like posting pictures of him on my wall (which is just plain mean if you ask me hahaha).
Obviously I have problems every now and then but half of them are only problems to myself because nobody else thinks they are a big deal but I tend to worry too much about a little thing until it turns into a massive problem in my head. I’m an overthinker and all.
I have had problems in the past with all sorts – making my own decisions, deciding whether or not to go out, stuck on some work, minor fall outs with friends. But none of these things are problems that have actually stuck with me until now meaning that not any of these are problems worth worrying about because half the time they are solved within a day or so.
And.. like the very good quote taken from Pinterest made by the amazing Captain Jack Sparrow ~ its not the problem that causes you trouble and stress, its the way you handle it. You can either let it get you down so you’re depressed and worrying, or alternatively, you can take it as a challenge and be proud of yourself for dealing with it so calmly and have a little celebration when its over hahahaha
BUT always remember, A problem shared is a problem halved. And trust me, this is so true. The more people that know about it, the more help you will recieve to solve it.
When I first like at this I struggled to think of something that I was proud of. I thought that was scary and quite sad that I hadn’t done one thing that I was proud of. But that was just it, there’s not just one thing that I am proud of yet. I’m only 16 so it’s not like I’ve fully lived my life yet and these years just allow you to live, have fun and build up to that one thing in your life that you are incredibly proud of.
However, although I don’t just have one thing there is just one small thing that I’m proud of so far and that’s just me. I might sound vain and big headed but why shouldn’t I be allowed to be proud of myself? I’m proud of the fact I grew up with some amazing people. I’m proud of myself for making the friends I did. I’m proud of how organised I am. And in particular I’m proud of my 14 A*-C’s that I achieved at GCSE last year and the important decisions and changes in my life that I have made recently making me become the happy and independent self that I am and I am incredibly proud of myself for that.
So to conclude, I am proud of myself and that’s all that matters at 16. With my pride I can do and achieve anything and not let anything get in the way. Any changes I need to make, I’ll do because I always want to remain the happy, proud person that I am now.
Honestly, I don’t believe in ‘what if?’.
‘What if I didn’t do this, would it have been different?’ – Well to be honest whats the point in thinking about this, its really just a waste of energy isn’t it. Thinking about what could’ve happened instead of what actually happened won’t change anything.. It won’t turn the clocks back and let redo it, and as much as you wish it did, life doesn’t give second chances.
What if this happens? What if that happens? – These are questions I find myself thinking before I go out whether it was to school or college, or just out with friends. And that too was a waste of energy because its very rare that it actually happens.
And finally the positive ‘what ifs’. The ones that could actually get you somewhere in life. ‘What if I was rich?’ ‘What if I became successful?’ These are the only ‘what ifs’ that I find acceptable because these are dreams and wishes that you can make come true and if you really believe in it and set your mind to it then theres nothing you can’t actually reach in life.
So basically, I don’t have a specific ‘what if..’ that I constantly think about and worry about but i’m not saying that I never think about them, because I do.. quite a lot. But what is the point in thinking about it? Because it actually gets you nowhere. Next time you get yourself worrying about something irrelevant or wishing something hadn’t happened then just remember that you can only move forward from these things and no matter how much you think about it you can never change the past so think about what you can achieve, and what you will learn from your mistakes because thats the only way you can actually change your direction.
As usual I got my picture from Pinterest.
I haven’t ever actually looked into my horoscope/zodiac really until writing this post and its actually quite interesting in the similarities that it actually tells you to who your person actually is. So I googled it and ended up on this website which told me some of the qualities that people with the Zodiac ‘Cancer’ often share and it can be surprising with the accuracy whether the information is completely fictional or not.
The first thing that I picked up on was that it told me that Cancer’s are usually ‘over-reactive and moody’, as much as I don’t want to admit it.. it could be true I suppose. I do over-react if my brothers annoy me, or if something shocks me or scares me and I am definitely one to exagerate the whole situation when telling the tale back to someone. If i’m in an incredibly bad mood and someone annoys me I can completely over-react to the point of shouting and crying.. but only on my bad days hahahaha
It also said ‘you adapt when you have to, but you much prefer to make changes on your own terms’ and this totally relates to me. I hate when someone/something changes something in my day to day life without me having an opinion or given any control in what happens – hate it. I prefer so much more being in control of my own life and make a change if I feel that its right or better for me. A very minor example was at college, in one of my subjects the teacher changed the whole seating plan so he moved us next to people we barely knew – I went through with it and coped with the lessons but I hated it so much. However, in one of my other subjects I asked the teacher if I could move somewhere else so I could concentrate and because I was in control of the ‘change’ I was perfectly fine.
‘Creative enterprises are a great way to make the most of your moods and your imagination. Music and writing are perfect vehicles for you. You can express the inner part of your being as entertaining literary, art or music pieces.’ This could also fit my personality because I have music on my ipod that fits every one of my moods so if i’m feeling sad then I listen to slow songs so I can feel sorry for myself just a little bit longer hahaha and if i’m feeling energetic and lively then I just listen to more of an upbeat song then dance and sing at the top of my voice around my room – you know, because I can. I also love writing too, hense the massive amounts of writing i’ve done so far on this post (I apologise if you lost interest in this post a while back but I like to talk, oh and if you’ve reached this far with interest then WELL DONE, might as well carry on – maybe even like the post and give me a follow whilst your at it).
You love to collect or keep mementos — such as scrapbooks and other bits and pieces — that bring back memories of good times and people you care about. You have a great memory, not just for facts, but also any good turn or kindness you’ve received. – I do this too! I am obsessed with keeping little things such as train tickets, concert things, pictures etc, and sticking them in my scrapbook or putting them on my wall so I can look through later on and smile at the great memories i’ve spent with people I love. On the last day of High School I also took a little book with me and let all my close friends write a little message in there for me with our memories and things and I love reading through it (even if it does make me sad reading memories from people I’m no longer close with). But for most outings i’ve had I have a little thing that reminds me of the day whether it is just a boring little ticket, a drinks mat, or an amazing picture from the night to preserve a great memory.
I was looking forward to this blog post from first seeing it on the list and had been planning on the type of things i’d write and show you so you get an insight into my wardrobe. However, today did not go to the plan when I woke up to a windy snowy mess outside and so decided to go for some cosy pyjamas and several blankets.
Excuse the quality of the pictures, i’m taking them on my phone so it doesn’t really focus the same as my camera does and you can only see the bottoms of my pyjamas which isn’t great because obviously i’m still wearing them so I wasn’t prepared to part with them to take a photo and didn’t particularly want my face on the picture due to a no make up day and scruffy hair that has just been thrown up. However, what you might not notice is these pyjamas aren’t just ordinary pyjamas, because it is in fact a Onesie! But not just any onesie, a mickey mouse onesie which just makes them ten times better really don’t they. It is the warmest most cosiest onesie that you could ever wear on a freezing cold day like today. Along with this onesie, I wore my night poncho and like a trillion blankets over the top. (Excuse the mess of the bedroom). Also, as I type this i’m wearing my face mask cause you know ‘facial friday’ and all ~ i’m joking about that, but my skin hasn’t been too great recently so i’m hoping a face mask will leave my face soft and spot free – if its a miracle.
Pyjamas, face mask, and magazines = perfect Friday night
Nice little collage made my me of course hahaha of the top five guys that I find attractive. Just in case you don’t recognise any of them I’ve put the names below.
Five guys who I find attractive
- Liam Hemsworth
- Chris Milligan (Kyle Canning from Neighbours)
- Zac Efron
- Channing Tatum
- Niall Horan (who definitely waved at me last weekend, hahaha)
One reason why I wanted to do the blogging challenge was because it allowed the blogging world to learn some things about me before I began to blog the things that I wanted to do. Sort of like an introduction to myself so I think a post about my Family is perfect to do this. I won’t bore you all with massive paragraphs about each and every member of my family because theres too much to say about them all and I love every one of them just as much. But this will be a little post about my family that I live with which is my Mum, Dad and two brothers, Bradley and Jordan.
Above is the family that I live with and without them I’d be lost. This was the day we ventured out for a meal in a Limo for my Mums 50th birthday (12/12/12). My Mum and Dad are supportive and caring all the time and are successful in everything they do, i’m so glad I got the two most perfect people as my parents. I have two brothers Bradley and Jordan who I love so so much. Bradley is a Piano Technician and is amazing on every instrument going – piano, guitar, harmonica, ukelele etc and Jordan is a trainee accountant but both are full time typical big brothers ~ incredibly annoying and slightly strange, but my best friends that I love so much.
A little collage of old and recent pictures of my family which capture all our closeness and our weirdness. And in the top left corner my Grandad Jack just sneaks into the college, a picture taken from my prom which I love so much.
..And not forgetting our baby 7 month old Maltese Terrier, Sully.